Life Goes On…

As I drive, I do what I consider, my best thinking. Lately, with driving back and forth to the rehab facility 30 minutes away to be there for Bob, I have had a lot of time to think. I am also visiting with Pete who has esophageal cancer and is on Hospice. He lives 30 minutes away as well.

While driving, the phrase “Life Goes On” came to mind. I seem to say it often and flippantly. No longer. Sometimes life does not go on. Life goes on……until it doesn’t. That is a reality for many and for all of us at one point in our days. I remember when my mom died suddenly. I supposed it wasn’t suddenly, but I did not see the signs. I prayed that would never happen again. I selfishly wanted time to be with the person I loved and say goodbyes. My dad then died after lingering and languishing with lung cancer that spread to his bones and brain. My prayer changed that this would never happen again teaching me that no way is a good way for those left behind.

It is a reality that we all will die, and as I get closer to that date, although it can happen at any age, it is on my mind a bit more. My faith in God who has promised eternal life tells me that life goes on in a new, better way. So, in one way the phrase is true. Life does go on forever and ever amen with my Lord and Savior. I cling to that promise.

However, while here on earth the phrase “Life goes on …. until it doesn’t” holds true. My funeral service is written along with a song playlist. My documents are all in order. My kids know my wishes. My scrapbooks are generally always up to date. Hopefully, I will have visited all 50 states and have walked a labyrinth in each and collected a Starbucks mug from each. Most importantly though, I try not to think about it. Not to think about 30 years from now when there will be things going on in my kids’ and grandkids’ lives that I won’t be a part of. I try to live life now. Just sometimes when I’m driving the thoughts come. “Life goes on…..until it doesn’t.”