Sharon
For the past 4 years I have walked a labyrinth on this date to remember my sister Sharon whose heart stopped beating for 11 minutes on this date in 2020. The paramedics got it started again and took her to the hospital. I received a call from my niece, and our lives stopped on a dime. If you scroll back there is a Notes called that about my sister.
I walk to honor, remember and focus on her. Walking a labyrinth is a great way to do that especially if I have someone with me that remembers her as well; and we can swap stories as we walk bringing tears, laughter and ah-ha moments. Jason and I did that one year in MN. This year it is so bitter cold and most labyrinths are covered with the 11.1” of snow that fell over the weekend so I will wait to walk before Valentine’s Day which is when her machines stopped.
Still miss her tremendously and always will. I still think of calling her when I have a question about my mom or dad or extended family, when I’m scrapbooking and wonder who someone is in an old photo, or when I have a question about something my mom cooked. She was 11 years older than me so our memories sometimes would be different, but yet the same.
She always wanted to go on a girls’ retreat with me and my daughters. It never happened. She wanted to travel with me when she retired. It never happened. She wanted me to come to her house in Michigan to go through all my mom’s and grandmother’s things. It never happened. There is a song out now by George Birge that resonates with me deeply. Many of the words may not apply to my situation but the chorus brings tears to my eyes.
It might be crazy, it might be sweet
Might not be perfect and it might be
The last thing that you ever saw coming
But it gets a little better when it's spinning 'round something, so
Buy the drink, steal the kiss, make the trip, take the risk
Love hard as you can and just hold on
'Cause life might be a lot of things
But it won't be long
It won't be long.
Isn’t that the truth? It won’t be long. Waiting to retire to do things? Not finding the time to go to Michigan? Not making a girls’ retreat happen? It wasn’t long before it was too late to make any of them happen. I’ve learned not to wait if at all possible. As I’ve told my kids, when I die they will not have an inheritance or anything to fight over as happens in some families, because I’m spending it all now to have experiences with them all while I’m here because life might be a lot of things but it won’t be long.
She used to sign her cards - one of which I recently found when I moved - “As Always, Sharon.”
I wish always was forever. I miss you deeply, Sharon. Now, where is my hanky?
Our last picture together at her cottage. Neither of us look our best but it was the best memory of relaxing on her pontoon boat, laughing and enjoying our time together.